A Moment of Honesty: I Wasn't Ready

(Where You Disappear to Son?) Maintaining Putting Myself in a Position Most of These Rappers Ain't In.- Jay-Z



I Do Not Own This Art.

I know- I know, exactly what you are thinking. Where the hell have you been?  The truth is that my 30th birthday, hit me harder than I realize. If you follow me on IG,you know that most of February, I was swimming in my feelings. I was sad that my outwards reality, wasn’t reflecting how I felt on the inside. And in the end- I dropped the ball with Honestly Sis, in a major way.



Instead of editing the letters once a week, designing them the next and placing them in clue. I was doing last minute stuff: working on letters the week of and sometimes even a few days before. Naturally, in combination with the Jack Jones retreat deadline, all of this came back to bite me. But fear not, last week I kicked myself in the ass and got most of the letters edited. (I still have about four more to go). But, things will be back in flow shortly. During this period, of course, the universe answered a prayer and I got reposted by Myleik. This sent a flood of newcomers to Honestly Sis. 



As excited as I was for the increase, I wasn’t prepared for it! This situation taught me that it’s pointless to build systems- if I’m not going to implement them. It also proved that recognition and increase is great- but it truly means nothing- if the work isn’t there. In February, I thought that this increase was what I wanted. I thought that if more people found Honestly Sis, it would make me feel better. But the truth is, it didn’t-- Don’t get me wrong, it made me happy. But, only because it meant that more people got to see the work. Only because it meant more people could potentially be healed and liberated by Honestly Sis. At the end of the day, I realized what meant the most wasn’t the increase but the work and doing the work.

This revelation lift a weight off my shoulders and allowed me to stop looking outwards for validation. But we all do it. Right now, ask yourself, what are things are you looking (or waiting) for that’s outside of yourself? This situation allowed me to see that eventually the inside growth will reveal its self outwardly. But only when I focus on what I can do and control. Which only validated the belief, “That everything I need is already inside of me.”



I say all that to say, I apologize for allowing my emotions to get the best of me. But I’m only human. As much as I want to run Honestly Sis, like a well operated company- it’s just me- I must edit every single letter- find quotes- chop up videos- create post for social media- find gifs and so much more. I don’t say that to complain but to give you perspective. Until my dream team manifest itself, it’s just me. That’s why it’s imperative for me to get my systems in place. (And I will!) In the meantime, check out the Honestly Sis YouTube channel. I will be doing a 3 to 4-part series on How to Make a Change- because I know that shit can be hard sometimes.   I kick off the series, by explaining why it’s imperative to read “The Alchemist”.



Last- last thing I’m about to start the 5th and final draft of The Association. My time is going to be very limited. (That’s why I’m trying to get my shit together!) So, my priority will be Honestly Sis and finishing the Association only. But if you do get a chance to check out Honestly Sis TV, let me know what you think.  I’m playing around with the format, so any feedback would be greatly appreciated! Also, if there is any topics that you think will be good for the channel (because right now, I’m out after this series) please let me know!



And as always, if you have a story that you want to share: HIT ME UP!! (The sooner the better.) Below are the videos available on YouTube, time stamps are included in the description box. 

How to Stop Counting Yourself Out

In this video, I discuss how you can count yourself out before you even start, the power of standing in your power and the importance of listening to your emotions.



How to Clean, Program and Use Your Crystals & Yoni Egg (+ Info on Healing Sexual Trauma

In this video, I  discuss how to go about finding the right crystal, cleaning it, program it and practical ways to use it! 




Why You Should Read the Alchemist: For Feeling Stuck, the Quarter Life Crisis & Spiritual Awakening

In this video, I define feeling Stuck, The Quarter Life Crisis and Spiritual Awakening. I also explains the importance of reading the Alchemist and pull a card for further guidance from Spirit. This is Part 1 of the How to Make a Change Series.




-AM


Until next time: 

“Dream them dreams. Then man-up and live them dreams, because a life without dreams is black and white. And the universe flows in technicolor and surround-sound.”- The Late Great Combat Jack!

Have a story that you would love to tell? I want to hear it!Have a friend that needs to read this? Forward it to her!Want to receive this every week? Join the Honesty CircleWant to talk about this? Become an Honest Member and Chat in the Archives!   Honestly Sis, is a bi-weekly newsletter.  See you in two weeks! 


© 2018 by Amber C. Sillmon 45601 S Interstate 94 Service DR #2762, Belleville, MI 48112